It's one of the most exciting times on the sports calendar as the real bowl games are set to begin in college football, but in the recent lull in the action, something had to fill the void. For me, that was the NFL and NBA. In this edition of the ramblings, I'll start with what is wrong with the NFL.

The NFL Stinks

Like many people around the country, I'm home for the holidays. No work, no class, just catching up with friends and watching more sports than is healthy. After watching yesterday's slate of "meaningful" NFL games I came to a conclusion, one that threatens to change my life as I know it. The NFL is awful, uncompelling garbage.

Sports fans across the nation bemoan the BCS as an imperfect system for determining supremacy in the world of college football, whining about instituting a playoff system. The NFL is thought to be a great postseason system, but it has significant flaws of its own. This season's prime example being the San Diego Chargers limping into the playoffs with an 8-8 record while a superior and exceedingly compellng Patriots team has to watch the Chargers host a playoff game while they go on an extended vacation. The Patriots' screw-job plus the fact that I'm from Cleveland means the NFL is pretty much dead to me this year. And I'm not sure that I'll be returning with any regularity.

The NFL has reached massive proportions, easily sweeping past baseball as the official sport of the U.S. But the very things that have made the NFL a gigantic fiscal and popular success are the things that make it an inferior product to college football. The salary cap is an unmitigated disaster. Sports are built on heroes and villains, but with a salary cap in place, every team is roughly the same. The only way a team wins consistently over time is by lucking out in the draft with a Peyton Manning or Tom Brady. The few transcendent players and coaches keep a couple of teams in the playoffs for multiple years, while the other 30 teams experience anything from mild, sporatic success to mediocrity (with the Detroit Lions excluded of course).

The only reason I watched the NFL with any interest last year was because the Patriots were an unparalleled force in the history of the sport. They defied the odds and slapped the salary cap in the mouth by stealing Wes Welker and Randy Moss from their respective teams, turning an already great team into the only 16-0 squad in the history of the sport.

Now what we have is a collection of teams once thought to be the best in the league but found to be slightly above average. They will bludgeon each other in close, mildly exciting games. A champion will be crowned who proved themselves to be slightly better than the competition, and next year six new teams of equal mediocrity will make the playoffs and we'll start this all over again. Without a team or teams to hate for being the haves among have-nots, a sport just doesn't have the same appeal. So goodbye for now NFL.

The State of the Cleveland Browns

I've pretty much given up on the Browns as they are a consistent disappointment and are one of the few teams in the league that manage to fail consistently despite every team being just a player away from the playoffs. Their 10-6 season was a sham and the true Browns showed themselves this year. The Browns were incompetently coached by a man whose headset was surely disconnected and torn apart by an offensive line that took a step back, the mediocrity of Derek Anderson, and the diva bullshit of Braylon "Dr. Drops" Edwards.

Just a year ago Browns fans were upset about finishing 10-6 but missing the playoffs. Derek Anderson was headed to the Pro Bowl and the future looked bright. Enter the 2008 season and the true face of this franchise made itself known. Turns out Derek Anderson really isn't a geat quarterback and that the defense still needs four or five more players to be competent. Mercifully, Romeo Crennel was insta-fired so one problem is solved. From what I've see, literally anybody could get more out of this team than Romeo did this year. So I'd like to welcome the new coach, whoever he may be, with open arms. You must be better than the alternative.

Seems like trading Derek Anderson may have been the way to go after all. Not that I called it or anything. Teams started figuring him out halfway through last year, and it showed in the stats. To think that this fail of a season could have at least ended with an extra first and third round pick only makes the fans' hearts hurt more. Sure the team probably would have been equally bad without DA, but at least they'd have two first round picks to look forward to. Instead, they sit at #5 in the draft order with way too many holes to fill and way too few draft picks to fill them. The Browns are without picks in the 3rd, 5th, and 7th rounds this April, so they will have to plug 15 holes with four draft picks. Who they will take at #5 is anybody's guess. They may be better off trading down for more picks, taking a page out of the Patriots' playbook. Paying a guy huge money who may or may not pan out at #5 is much more risky than adding cheaper draft picks.

The good news is that the Browns may part ways with any or all of Kellen Winslow, Braylon Edwards, and Derek Anderson. The even better news is that they will get far less value for these players than they would have at the same point last year. Nothing quite like selling low and buying high to build a franchise. It's at this point that I bid the Browns' adieu, saving myself from an early coronary while those around me risk spontaneous combustion over a team who has proven to be nothing but a disappointment for half a century. It's a useless risk to my health to root for a team I know will fail despite an economic system that is set up to allow terrible teams to become good in the blink of an eye.

DeShawn Stevenson is a Dope

The Cavaliers and Wizards were supposed to be among the elite in the Eastern Conference, and with all the animosity that has developed between the two in the last three postseasons, it made sense for them to meet in prime time Christmas Day. Of course, only one team has lived up to their expectations, with the other falling flat on their faces despite the presence of the player who DeShawn Stevenson thinks is the best player in the league, DeShawn Stevenson. You may remember DeShawn for calling out LeBron James as being overrated and waving his hand in front of his face with every basket he made despite his team getting worked in six games, losing the final game in hilarious fashion at home. If you are like most NBA fans, you probably forgot DeShawn existed hours after the conclusion of that series. But alas, DeShawn is alive and sucking in DC.

But before I get into the events of the 25th, a bit of history needs to be re-hashed. With all the trash the Wizards talk to and about the Cavs, you would think that the "rivalry" is at least competitive. But in reality, it's more a pathetic case of a little brother overcompensating for their deficiencies against big brother by yelling louder and throwing a fit when they don't get their way. The Wizards are an incredible 3-12 in the last three postseasons against LeBron and company despite the presence of the face waver and the cocky nothing who dubbed himself Agent Zero, apparently after the number of playoff series he's won against the Cavs. To be fair, Caron Butler and Antawn Jamison are ballers, and I'd love to have either of them on the Cavs. But the rest of the team is a bunch of unerachieving shit-talkers trying to make their name by taunting the greatest player in the world despite the fact that he has destroyed them three straight years.

Back to Christmas Day. The Wizards nearly beat the Cavs in Cleveland as the Fighting LeBrons came out flat and disinterested. Luckily, the Wizards remembered who they were playing and laid down like the disappointments they've proven to be year after year. But even though DeShawn is a bench player for a 5-23 team, he decided he needed to draw the ire of Cleveland fans once again, waving his hand in front of his face when he hit a two point jumper after rebounding his three point shot that Delonte West had just bitch-slapped. Marv Albert then informed the audience that this gesture means that DeShawn thinks he is so hot that he can't feel his face. Albert correctly editorialized how ridiculous this is since DeShawn is a 31% shooter on a horrific team that he doesn't even start for. The only reason DeShawn shouldn't be able to feel his face is due to multiple strokes because you can be sure that he is never, EVER on fire. But you got what you wanted DeShawn. You got a few more minutes of attention. Now back to mediocrity you go you delusional dope. See you in the playoffs. Oops........

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Nick Meyer2 said:

	hey guys, good points there...the NFL should be better but what I hate is the CONSTANT COMMERCIALS and CONSTANT CHALLENGES, i groan every time there's a close catch cuz i know it's a ticket to ten minutes of wasted time.
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January 10, 2009
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Jim Smith said:

I can agree with you when it comes to the Browns! But your point of view somewhat contradicts your other comments where you write that the NFL is a group of teams that are pretty much at the same level year to year and only marginally different based upon luck or in having the top flight QB. First of all, I am happy that my team, the Steelers, competes in the same division as the Browns and Bengals. So much for league parity. Year after year after year with few exceptions those two teams languish at the bottom of the AFC North cellar. This is inspite of enjoying top round draft picks, including high dollar, draft QBs. Meanwhile my beloved Steelers have the winningest record over the past nearly 30 years. They have made the AFC Championship game 4 of the past 10 years. And since the days of Terry Bradshaw in the 1970's, Big Ben has been their only first round QB draftee. So maybe those teams that win year after year like Pittsburgh, New England are doing some things better, coaching and drafting for example. Afterall Mike Tomlin is only the 3rd head coach for the Steelers since 1970 --a period of 38 years! Ownership I think may also play a part. Would you rather things be set up like baseball where the Haves vs. the Have-Nots win based upon the size of their pocketbooks and markets? My Pittsburgh Pirates have 16 straight losing seasons. At least in the NFL you can start the season with renewed hope of some degree (except for Detroit). As to playoffs, I agree with you as to the travesty of an 8-8 team making the playoffs while teams with double-digit wins sit on the sidelines. But didn't NBA basketball, NHL hockey and ML baseball set the stage by making money more important than having the two best teams face off? In baseball a team that wins 115 games can be defeated by a team winning 88 games. Why? Because one injury or dropped ball, etc can allow any team to defeat another in a 5 or 7 game series. Finally, as to NFL overtime. Any time my team loses the coin flip for OT I cringe. History says that the team losing the coin flip still wins nearly 50% of the time. But it doesn't seem quite fair as you suggested in having the MVP QB sit on the side lines as his defense loses the game in OT. Kind of reminds you of an undefeated Division I team not getting a chance to play for the National Championship. But it does create much discussion. I say we should eliminate the bowl games all together and vote on the teams that we think should win. I have this great spreadsheet file with a zillion formulas that would do a better job predicting the national championship bowl game experience than what we have now. Talk about controversy...

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January 16, 2009
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onearmedbandit said:

Hey Jim, I appreciate the comments. You made several interesting points. First, despite there being a fairly level playing field, a few teams have managed to be either consistently good or bad. The teams that have been consistently good this decade include the Patriots (who have missed the playoffs twice following Super Bowl seasons), the Steelers, the Colts, and the Eagles. These teams are exceptionally well run, have or have had elite QBs for a majority of their run, and are led by long-tenured coaches (though Cowher is gone and Dungy isn't far behind). All of these teams drafted their QBs, three of them in the top half of the first round. All are led by strong defensive identities, even though he Colts are known much more for their offense. So the three main things they share are: 1. Strong coaching 2. Great QBs 3. Talented ownership/GM who care The have nots also share common factors. I would put Detroit, Arizona, Cincinnati, Cleveland, and maybe the Raiders in there, even though they made the Super Bowl in 2002. The things that these teams share is the lack of a franchise quarterback (though Carson Palmer can be one if he ever stays healthy), no great head coach or team philosophy, and varying degrees of ownership and GM incompetence or carelessness. Even with these problems, only the Lions haven't made the playoffs this millenium. The Bengals were a team on the rise until Carson Palmer's knee got shredded, the Browns made the playoffs with Kelly Holcomb at quarterback and went 10-6 last year, Arizona is on the verge of a Super Bowl, and the Raiders were in a Supr Bowl not too long ago. So that's nine teams that are outliers among 23 others that have had at least a little bit of success. I'd say that's pretty strong parity. And the problem I have isn't with parity, it's with the watered-down product the fans get. Sure it's more fan friendly for a league to have a cap and let every city believe they tuly have a chance before the season, but then where does the Cinderella story come from? Where is the hated team like the Yankees or Red Wings. When a team is always a year away from turning things around, the turnarounds become more frequent and therefore less special. When the separation between teams is so thin, it sucks the life out of a great sport. As great as the Patriots were last year, they still lost the Super Bowl. So just how great were they really? The Browns went 10-6 with Derek Anderson at quarterback and no defense to speak of. The difference between 4-12 and 10-6 is so small, and thus the NFL has turned into a huge cash cow as everybody's team has a chance at the start of the season. That's cute for the fans, but when was the last time the equivalent of the Tampa Bay Rays happened in football? Not since the cap. And it won't happen again because it's an all too common occurrence for teams to turn things around based on one or two moves on their roster or in management (see the '99 Rams, '08 Cardinals, '08 Dolphins). I would argue that championships have depreciated in value because every team is so similar. You can go 4-12 one year and then win a Super Bowl thenext. Is it because of effective team building? Probably not. You probably lucked out in the draft or got some unheralded free agent that the omniscient scouts passed on in the draft. That is why baseball, while boring, is a better game for the fans. You have the Mets, Yankees, and Red Sox to hate. When a team with a payroll 1/4 that of those teams comes along and kicks the crap out of them, it's incredibly entertaining because it mirrors the Amrican dream. When the Dolphins make the playoffs after going 1-15 last year, you barely bat an eye. I'm sorry about your Pirates. One of my friends is a Pirates fan and I have seen the pain it brings him. I have endless respect for you long-suffering people. I know the struggle as a Clevelander, but at least the Browns have gotten an occasional taste of success over the last decade. I would argue that the Pirates' lack of success has a lot more to do with the comedy of errors discussed in this article (http://sports.espn.go.com/espn...d=tab4pos2) than a small payroll. Also, I love the baseball playoffs because only 8 teams make it. The NHL and NBA would be better served with an 8-team playoff pool. The round of 16 is just an excuse to make money. Why water down the end of the year by allowing sub-.500 teams into the postseason? I know it can create a Cinderella story for about a round, but that's not the true motivation. You'd still get plenty of great stories if you cut the first round in half. Again, thanks for the comments. I'd be interested to see what you have to say about some of my other articles.

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January 17, 2009
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